The trauma of feeling unwanted.
Trauma.Emotional trauma.I lived almost half a lifetime feeling unwanted. Those feelings came rushing back with a vengeance on Monday. Quite unexpectedly, I might add. But isn’t that usually the case with deep trauma? I honestly don’t know, which is why I’m asking. I only have my own lived experience. And therapy. Lots of therapy. Disclaimer: […]
T Jay to T.
A journey of self. Discovered. What’s in a name? But not just any name. What’s in a person’s name? My name is T. One letter. If you are picky, there’s a period after the T on my birth certificate – which is now accurate because my state is awesome. I never did claim the period. […]
Disappointed. Not Surprised.
If you’re new here, “Welcome!” TL:DR 2020 I started therapy in September. I came out as transgender in October. I separated from my wife and started HRT in November. 2021 I was divorced as of February 1. I socially transitioned on February 6. My gender was corrected by April. And I’ve been authentically me now […]
Visibly Invisible.
Hi. I’m T, and I’m visibly invisible. I am an openly gay, transgender woman living in a rural mountain town. Many consider this town overly conservative and religious – I’ve called it home since I was 5. That makes me about as visible as one can get. I am an openly gay, transgender woman living […]
Vlog 02 | I’m T.
Take 2! Multicam Edit. Color correcting. It’s a lot easier with photos. Matching cameras isn’t for the faint of heart. The usual: I got a mic! I’m learning to use it. Better audio soon. Focus Daniel San. I’m sure it’s a lighting issue. I’m still working on the balance between my overheads, ring lights, and […]
No friends.
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before, “40-year-old recently out transgender women signs up to do network marketing for newly launched lifestyle and athleisure brand with no network.” Why lead with that? The important thing here is not that I signed up to do network marketing. Don’t get me wrong, I am genuinely in […]
Thoughts on my upbringing.
Or thoughts on “thought in ‘the church.’” You’ll read this again if you get through this post. I want it here at the beginning too, because it sets the stage for the madness that follows. 😆 This post is something new for me. I had thoughts as I laid down and instead of just brushing […]
Words. From the heart.
The little boy couldn’t understand why she was different. The middle school boy didn’t understand why she didn’t fit in. The high school boy truly believed she was a mistake and destined for hell. The college boy’s eyes were opened to the fact that she was transgender. She wrestled with herself, wanting so desperately to […]
I don’t think I can be more out.
I don’t think I can be more out.
Truly. I don’t think there are any more coming outs that I have to undergo.
