I’m tired of being alone. For a minute I was feeling bad. Saying to myself, “you’ve only been divorced for a year and a half you haven’t really ever been alone.” But when I think about my life, the entirety of it has been spent alone. I never let anyone and even my ex-wife. This… Continue reading I’m her list.
It’s actually a prison. You sit there in your safe little box. You surround yourself with tv news and online articles that only support your beliefs and never challenge them. You limit your interactions with people in the world because heaven forbid, you meet someone you might disagree with. You have no direct experience in… Continue reading Your Box.
Disappointed. Not Surprised.
If you’re new here, “Welcome!” TL:DR 2020 I started therapy in September. I came out as transgender in October. I separated from my wife and started HRT in November. 2021 I was divorced as of February 1. I socially transitioned on February 6. My gender was corrected by April. And I’ve been authentically me now… Continue reading Disappointed. Not Surprised.
Vlog 02 | I’m T.
Take 2! Multicam Edit. Color correcting. It’s a lot easier with photos. Matching cameras isn’t for the faint of heart. The usual: I got a mic! I’m learning to use it. Better audio soon. Focus Daniel San. I’m sure it’s a lighting issue. I’m still working on the balance between my overheads, ring lights, and… Continue reading Vlog 02 | I’m T.
It hit me today. I’m going to miss a significant portion of my kids lives because I’m transgender.
It’s not my fault.
Before coming out I was really good at one thing in particular. Holding on to the pain and misery of it “being all my fault.” All of the fucking time.
It still hurts.
It.Still.Fucking.Hurts. I wasn’t enough. I’m not worth knowing. I did irreparable damage over 15 years. She’s embarrassed of me. She’s ashamed to have been married to me. She doesn’t want people to know that I’m the ex. “She’s not my husband.” Some of these I still feel so strongly at times. Others zip in and… Continue reading It still hurts.