It.Still.Fucking.Hurts. I wasn’t enough. I’m not worth knowing. I did irreparable damage over 15 years. She’s embarrassed of me. She’s ashamed to have been married to me. She doesn’t want people to know that I’m the ex. “She’s not my husband.” Some of these I still feel so strongly at times. Others zip in and… Continue reading It still hurts.
The app finally gendered me correctly. 😂
That is all.
I haven’t written in a while. There’s a reason. Guilt. I’ve had a post about transition and divorce running circles in my head for some time. You’ll have to wait longer for that one. Thoughts are still a mess on exactly what and how I want to talk about it.
I got it done today. I. Feel. AMAZING. That is all. Okay, one more. My mom complimented me on my hair! 💕 That is all for real this time. 😊
That doesn’t mean it’s been easy. I’m only two months post divorce (officially). We were pretty well separated when I moved out November 1. Moving on with your own life when someone else was so closely a part of that life for so long – it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever been faced with. It’s… Continue reading I’m doing okay.
I’m trying to take care of myself mentally and physically. The mental part has actually come quite easily since coming out. Without the continual mental struggle against dysphoria and feeling like a mistake, I find myself mentally clear and present. I’m just happy. I’m more productive at work. I’m present in more moments with my… Continue reading Ma’am.
“Hormones were probably delayed because my brain was looking for estrogen and my body was like, “nope, that’s not what the purchase order says.”
As far as the government is concerned, I am officially and have been ‘her’ since I was born.
It’s my birthday month. I turn 40 this year. It is also the month I am going to kick some ass and cross some things off my list.
Stay tuned. More content is coming on a more regular schedule.